I wanted to follow up on yesterday’s post.

When I say, “we have more power than we realize, or often choose to tap into, the power of the Holy Spirit living in us helping us! May we believe in His power, ask for His help, and receive His love!” I am trying to remind us that we have God with us ALL THE TIME. In the good and the bad. In the easy and the hard. And some days, weeks, months, it feels like there is more bad that good, more hard than easy. And that’s life.

I’m not advocating that we ignore the bad and hard or try to think it away with “positive” thoughts. No. I believe God made us resilient and capable of feeling it all, embracing it all as part of life. He gave us our emotions and I believe He made us capable of feeling them and moving through them.

When I say, “we have the power to choose what we think. We choose what we make circumstances and situations mean with our thinking. We choose what we think about other people which determines our relationships. Our thoughts create our feelings and from our feelings we take actions. Our actions give us the results of our lives. Let us be found thinking on Truth! Believing the best about ourselves and others! Believing what God says about us. Accepting His grace and goodness for each of us! Believing He is working all things out for our good and His glory even when it doesn’t make sense to us.”

I want us to realize the power we have. The power God gave us to create our feelings. I think we often think that we feel the way we feel because of the circumstances, situations, or the people in our lives. We tend to think these external factors are causing our feelings. But I have learned that we choose what we think about the circumstances, situations, and people in our lives and have feelings based on those thoughts. We make the circumstances, situations, and people mean something with the way we think about them. I’m saying we need to take ownership of our emotions. We take ownership of our thoughts which are creating our emotions. We take responsibility for ourselves.

I want us to acknowledge how we feel. Name it. Speak it. Feel the feelings in our body. And be kind to ourselves! Not beat ourselves up for feeling the way we feel.

This weekend after all that had happened over the past few weeks, I was angry, devastated, heartbroken, confused, slightly overwhelmed, tired. I ate donuts and pizza (because I find comfort in food). I paid attention to the fact that I was easily irritated by seemingly everything. I texted my boys’ multiple times. I choose to do nothing/rest one afternoon. I talked with a friend. I went for a walk. I meditated. I journaled. Then on Monday, I decided to get back to my “normal” routine and somewhat healthier eating. I gave myself what I needed to process my feelings. I held space for me. I didn’t beat myself up for feeling the way I felt. I practiced self-compassion.

We practice accepting life as it is. We practice accepting ourselves in it.

Frederick Buechner said, “Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid.” We do not have to fear this world full of beautiful and terrible things because we believe God loves us. We believe God is with us. We believe that God is for us. We believe and rely on His power in us making us resilient, capable, and strong. Yes, and Amen!

I am encouraging us to practice awareness and acceptance of all of life. Admitting/acknowledging all our emotions. Not judging ourselves for our emotions or telling ourselves we shouldn’t feel this way. We process our emotions.

We embrace all our humanness. And I believe as we embrace all our emotions, we become kinder, more gracious, and loving people. When we realize and accept our own humanity it is easier to accept others in their humanity.

We come to realize, as we practice processing our emotions, that we do not need to be afraid of any emotions. We allow God to strengthen us and expand our capacity to feel all our emotions. We practice feeling our emotions, and as we practice, we get better at it. We practice self-compassion. We treat ourselves like we would a friend going through a similar experience.

Some things that help me process my emotions are…

I find it helpful to breathe, to take some deep breathes. Inhale for the count of 4 and exhale for the count of 4. Sometimes I repeat a word or mantra as I breathe deeply.

I recognize the emotions I am having, name them, allow them, and move through them. The Flow Tool is helpful with this.

FLOW TOOL

I feel angry that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel sad that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel afraid that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel guilty that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

On the other hand,

I feel grateful that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel happy that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel secure that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I feel proud that… (deep breath, drop into body)…

I find it helpful to go for a walk. To be outside and move my body.

I find it helpful to pour out my heart to God.

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
    for my hope is from him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
    my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory;
    my mighty rock, my refuge is God.

Trust in him at all times, O people;
    pour out your heart before him;
    God is a refuge for us. Psalm 62:5-8 ESV

I also find it helpful to journal, to get all my thoughts down on paper.

Using all these practices/tools to remind myself that I’m okay. Nothing has gone wrong. Nothing is wrong with me. I tell myself; I am doing a good job and of course all this would feel heavy and overwhelming, that is normal. Then I move through the emotions by remembering Truth and focusing on God’s good. I read, write, and claim scripture for myself. I tell myself; I am capable. I am resilient. God is with me.

I gently remind myself that I need not fear. I trust in God. Which helps me to come back to and maintain a positive outlook despite great difficulty. Really, I am coming back to and resting in God’s love for me. I am not using toxic positivity or denying reality. I acknowledge reality, the good and the bad, without trying to buffer or numb the feelings I don’t want to feel.

For me it is about HOPE. Hope in God. Hope in His love for me. Hope that He is in control. Hope that He is working all things out for my good and His glory, even when I am angry, devastated, heartbroken, and don’t understand.

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, Hebrews 6:19 NIV