I read in an Advent devotional the line, “The rude awakening that the way things are, is not the way things are supposed to be.”

“The way things are, is not the way things are supposed to be.” That is a puzzling statement for me.

If I believe in God, God being in control of everything, if I really trust in His Sovereignty, then life if always the way it is supposed to be.

I think we must stop fighting against what is, and the way we think it should or should not be and start accepting, this is how it is.

Only from a place of acceptance and acknowledgment of how things really are can we begin to change. We cannot change or improve on what we deny.

I don’t think God makes mistakes. I don’t think He causes tragedies. I think we live in a fallen world in which bad things happen, and there are challenges and struggles and things are unfair, but through it all we have a loving and good God who will take care of us as we trust Him.

I’m not saying this is easy.

We must be intentional. We must choose to believe God. We must do the work of staying rooted, grounded, centered in His Truth no matter what. Choosing to think on what is True, choosing to know God, be in relationship with Him.

We must stop fighting against what is or denying what is. We must choose to accept that, this is how it is, and this is how it is supposed to be.

We can grieve the fact that things didn’t turn out like we hoped or wanted or expected. We can grieve the loss of a person in our life or the loss of a dream or a broken relationship or the loss of a job or any other number of losses we experience. Sometimes I don’t think we acknowledge our losses and feel our way through them so then we end up stuck feeling bad in a weird place trying to deny how we feel or telling ourselves we should be feeling something different. No. Feel what you feel. Acknowledge it. Process it. And then move through it to a new place.

The Bible tells us, “Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God,” John 14:1  

We must believe. We must practice believing until it becomes ingrained in us.

God knows so much better than we do! We need to Trust Him! He has a better plan, the best plan. He loves us so much and wants good things for us. In my own experience, the hard stuff and the unexpected stuff of life has taught me so much about God’s love and I have deepened my relationship with Him during the tough times as I have sought after and clung to Him.

Do we have the faith to rest in His love and goodness and grace?

Do we take time to spend with Him, to read His Word, to communicate with Him so that we know His love for us in real and tangible ways?!

Do we trust that He knows best?

If we trust Him completely then we don’t have to fear because we know He’s got this!

God can work anything out, provide anything, change anything, exceed our imagination. We must believe in what is possible. Trust! And pray and ask for Him to help us overcome our unbelief.

Sometimes there are “storms” in life that we did not see coming. We are surprised by them. It feels like this is not how it is supposed to be. But that is just our thinking about the situation. What we think determines how we feel. I find it helpful during the unexpected storms to remind myself, “this is all part of it.” I might be surprised by the situation, but God is not. When an unexpected thing happens, we might feel like we are trying to batten down the hatches, and survive, without getting swept away in the process. Hopefully we have prepared for the unexpected storms by being rooted, grounded, centered in God so that when the storm hits, we turn to Him first for our strength, security, hope, and peace.

These past 18 months have thrown us for some unexpected loops. There have been storms we did not see coming. Life is always uncertain but there has been a heightened and on-going uncertainty that we are having to learn to deal with. There has been so much change. And the slinky effect of the multiple changes are still being realized and experienced. I must remind myself that “this is all part of it.”

It makes me think of a quote my cross-country coach would tell us, “Don’t worry about the things you cannot control because you cannot control them. Don’t worry about the things you can control because you can control them.” I have come to realize that the only thing I can control is myself.

As things are changing that I cannot control, I find it helpful to remember and remind myself that I am resilient. That I can control how I show up, the attitude and outlook I bring to any situation. That I can be flexible and adapt. I do the best I can with what I know right now and hope that everyone else is too. I practice being gracious and kind because that is what I hope others will offer me too as we all figure out things we have never been through before.

You are resilient. You control how you show up, the attitude you bring to any situation. You can be flexible and adapt.

Life is exactly as it should be because this is how it is. Practice accepting what is. Practice looking for the good. Practice being grateful, giving thanks for what is. And trust God.

Remember God is trustworthy and in control and good and loving!

Practice believing.

Nothing has gone wrong. You are exactly where you are supposed to be because this is where you are. Practice accepting. And if there are things you want to change in your life start from a place of acceptance and self-compassion. Life can be hard and overwhelming and challenging. Be kind to yourself as you move forward well from where you are. Trusting in God’s goodness and grace and the power of the Holy Spirit in you helping you create the life you want. You have agency. Believe in you. But more importantly believe in God’s ability to provide and heal and strengthen and give peace and love.

The way things are is how things are supposed to be.

Keep seeking and discovering!